*Thrown out of Fairyland for crimes against the Realm,* ***Kyle E. Miller*** *is a naturalist and moral philosopher living in Michigan. He can usually be found in the dunes or forests, turning up logs looking for life. Past incarnations include zookeeper, video game critic, retail manager, stablehand, and writing tutor. His fiction has appeared in* Clarkesworld, Three-Lobed Burning Eye, *and* Honey & Sulphur. *You can find more at [www.kyle-e-miller.com](http://www.kyle-e-miller.com/).*